Why Do So Many Brilliant Dyslexics and Dyscalculics Think They're 'Not Good Enough'?
- chloecoburncoachin
- Jul 24
- 6 min read
I used to decline every opportunity to present at meetings, not because I lacked knowledge or valuable ideas, but because the thought of stumbling over words or reading aloud filled me with shame. What I feared most was that someone might ask me to read something out loud; words jumping around, letters mixing up, broken fluency, obvious phonetic mistakes would confirm to others that I wasn't as smart as them, I didn't deserve to be in that space, that I had somehow faked it to get there.
My fail-safe excuse, the one I'd been using since age nine, if asked to read or respond to new text was, "Ahhhh, I have forgotten my glasses." Brilliant, right? Apart from the obvious fact that I could never wear my glasses to meetings, which also meant I couldn't see things on the whiteboard. But this still felt safer than the possibility of exposing my weakness.
This invisible belief that I wasn't as smart as others had taken root in my early childhood, where at school, my reports would state that I was in fact ‘very weak,’ my marks were low, and general comments from teachers reinforced that I was a professional daydreamer who should try harder.
We All Have Them
I think it's fair to say we all have limiting beliefs about ourselves or others that come and go or are deeply rooted from early childhood.
As someone who's dyslexic and dyscalculic, I've learnt that our limiting beliefs often come from those early school experiences, where our learning differences were perceived as learning deficiencies.
Imagine being the student who can tell you everything about the book you just read together in class, discussing themes and making great connections between the characters, but when it comes to the spelling test on Friday, you can barely manage half the words correctly.
Or you're 9 years old and brilliant at building the most amazing Lego creations, understanding exactly how pieces fit together and creating complex structures that wow everyone who sees them. You can tell time perfectly when looking at a clock, and you're the first to notice when something doesn't look quite right, like when the teacher accidentally writes the date wrong on the board. But when it comes to times tables, the numbers just won't stick. You might know that 6 x 7 = 42 on Monday, but by Wednesday it's completely gone from your head, and you're back to counting on your fingers whilst your classmates are rattling off answers. Or you look at the sum 23 + 15 and your brain sees the numbers jumping around, sometimes the 3 looks like it's in the wrong place, or you add perfectly but somehow end up writing 83 instead of 38.
Over time, these small moments, the confused looks, the red marks, the ‘tries hard but…’ comments on reports - accumulate and create deep-rooted limiting beliefs about ability and performance.
What These Beliefs Actually Sound Like
At school age: ‘I'm so slow.’ ‘I'll never be a good reader like everyone else.’ ‘People will think I'm stupid.’
In adulthood: ‘I can't apply for jobs that require good written communication.’ ‘I'll never be promoted.’ ‘I'm not leadership material because I struggle with numbers.’
As a parent: ‘I avoid helping my children with homework.’ ‘Numbers will never make sense to me.’ ‘I'm useless at time management and scheduling after-school clubs.’
Socially: ‘I'm not intellectual enough for certain social circles.’ ‘People will judge me if they see my mistakes.’
What's Possible When We Change
Perhaps you recognise yourself in some of these limiting beliefs. You're not alone. I think of Amy, who came to me saying she could never be promoted because of her spelling and writing, and here's what she told me six months later: ‘Chloe supported me to see my dyslexia in a different light. I always just saw my slowness as a sign of weakness and being less intelligent than my colleagues. Breaking free from this belief and recognising my strengths and unique abilities meant I gained confidence to apply for a promotion, and got it!’
What These Beliefs Really Cost Us
I've seen the statistics, and they're heartbreaking. According to the latest data from the Department of Education, ‘only 21.6% of students with learning difficulties like dyslexia achieved a grade 5 or higher in both English and Maths GCSE in 2023/2024, compared to 51.9 % of students without special educational needs. Even at the standard pass level (grade 4), just 39.5% of dyslexic students passed, while 72.3% of their peers did - a gap that's been stuck at over 30 percentage points for more than a decade.’ British Dyslexia Association.
When you don't tackle your limiting beliefs, they don't just mess with your education—they follow you into your career too. You might avoid going for promotions, turn down amazing opportunities, or hide in the back row instead of stepping up to present or lead.
How I Learnt to Rewire My Brain
When I trained to be a life coach, I was amazed to learn that our brains are literally rewiring themselves every single day based on what we believe to be true. Basically, those negative thoughts you have about yourself just get stronger over time, making it easier for your brain to automatically think, ‘I can't do this.’
Why Our Brains Are Actually Amazing
Where it gets really interesting for me is that my brain is already wired differently. Dyslexics and Dyscalculics have these incredible strengths like big-picture thinking, creative problem-solving, and the ability to see patterns others miss. We are naturally entrepreneurial, artistic, and innovative. Yet somehow, traditional education systems, with their emphasis on phonics and timed tests, completely miss the point of how our brilliant minds actually work.
It's like judging an architect by how fast they can memorise poetry, completely missing the point of what makes them exceptional. Many systems and situations were never designed for minds like mine. Once I understood this, everything started to change. I could start rewiring those neural pathways with beliefs that actually matched my ability.
My 5-Step Process
Awareness: I listen out for limiting thoughts.
Evidence Collection: I build a ‘wins’ journal, writing down my small daily wins.
Reframing Techniques: When I hear myself say something like ‘I can't,’ I change it to ‘I'm learning how to."’
Identify My Strengths: I write down where my unique strengths lie.
My Support Network: I find friends, colleagues, peers, family members, that I trust and can count on.
Start Here: 3 Things You Can Do This Week
1. Start Your Evidence Journal
Write down 3 things you accomplished today, no matter how small
Note moments when your brain worked differently but effectively
Include compliments or positive feedback you received
2. Identify Your Learning Style
Visual learners: Use mind maps, colours, and diagrams
Auditory learners: Try recording notes or talking through problems
Kinaesthetic learners: Use movement, manipulatives, or hands-on approaches
3. Identify and Challenge One Limiting Belief
Pick your strongest negative belief about learning
Write it down, then rewrite it as: ‘I’m learning how to…’
Find one piece of evidence that contradicts this belief
You've Got This
I know that changing a belief you've carried for years isn't easy, there will be days when that old voice in your head creeps back in, absolutely convinced it's telling the truth because it's been there for so long.
What I encourage when this happens is to remind yourself that:
Every struggle you've faced has built inner resilience.
Every time you've had to find a different way to learn something, you've strengthened that creative problem-solving muscle.
The world needs diverse minds like yours, minds that see solutions, find connections, and refuse to accept ‘that's just how it’s always been’
Why not start today with the 3 immediate actions above and do this for one week? Take that beautiful, complex, brilliant brain of yours and show the world what you're really capable of.
Get in touch today to learn more about how my coaching can support you personally and professionally. To book a free connection call, follow the steps on my website or pop me an email at info@chloe-coburn-coaching.com.
Follow Me on Social Media
Comments